Bad Movies Rule!

The post office called at 11 a.m. and told us to come get our stuff before they start charging rent. We skipped a week. The box retaliated.

This mailbag is Ryan, Clint, and a table full of things we did not earn. Art sent a Chuck Norris Karate Kommandos figure and a pile of Pop Rocks, then stood back. Cory sent a Goldfinger DB5 with a working ejector seat and a 14-and-up warning we immediately stress-tested. A typewriter letter from our dark lord of stubbed toes claims Mattress Mack produced Sidekicks to settle a debt, then pivots into a Walker, Texas Ranger note, a Junior Rangers pitch, and a request that we still do Trial by Fire. We are doing Trial by Fire.

The movie pile is unhinged. Popstar. Grizzly. The Final Girls. Exorcist II. A Titans triple feature nobody can read the year on. Pluto Nash. Hell House LLC. Jack Frost and Christmas Vacation 2. Tammy and the T-Rex. Neighbors. Theodore Rex. Haunted Honeymoon. The Couch Trip. Donnie Darko, which one of us has successfully avoided out of spite. The first season of Welcome to Derry. The Ladies Man. Student Bodies, which promises 1,423 laughs. Then Murph closes the show with a cassette player, a drawing of Arnold and Carl Weathers, and a stack of soundtracks: Rocky IV, Iron Eagle, Rambo, Batman, Lost Boys, Octopussy, Beverly Hills Cop II, and a blank tape we are absolutely sending back as a mix.

Emails and voicemails cover a Terminal Velocity voting apology, a Sleepaway Camp curve argument, sword-and-sandal picks from Canada, a Mississippi spelling lesson, a Robert Englund convention story, Richard Pryor’s Moving, and Brian Boucher lobbying for movies that still shoot in actual towns. Kokomo, we are coming.

Packages, letters, and voicemails: ThisShowIsTrash@gmail.com and 262-757-8567

BMR Hits the Spot playlist is on Spotify if you want the soundtrack version of this problem.
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This episode is sponsored by Quince - 40% off and free shipping here, and it supports the show! - quince.com/badmovies

A kid has a vision, his mom rips the good-luck tag off his luggage, and an entire plane full of students explodes. The movie says it's death. We say it's mom.

Stephanie is back, Brian Draws Movies is back, and Jesse returns to the studio with a confession: his younger self, who loved this movie on VHS, might have been a dumbass. Or he's sandbagging. You'll have to stick around to find out.

On the scene-by-scene, we dig into the FBI agents who wandered in from an X-Files reject pile, the most baffling memorial sculpture ever unveiled, an owl with a front-row seat to Devon Sawa's private time, a small-town mortician who is extremely obviously Candyman, and the forensic breakthrough of the century: caramelized blood. Plus a 47-year-old baby, a girl named Clear Rivers (yes, on purpose), Seann William Scott one year after Stifler, a sentient live wire with a grudge, and a death-fart theory that may have cost one of us a night on the couch.

Then we hand out the hardware, including the Will Patton Award for Intensity and the Steven Seagal Trash Can Full of Dirt, before the final verdict. Is this a horror classic that still holds up, or did we all just have terrible taste in 2000?

Also, Arnold Schwarzenegger punches death in Paris. It goes about how you'd expect.

Support Us: patreon.com/badmoviesrule

Email Us: ThisShowIsTrash@gmail.com

Voicemail: 262-757-8567

Mail: Bad Movies Rule, PO Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105

Gear Up: Grab tees at teepublic.com/user/bad-movies-rule

Check out Brian's work: briandrawsmovies.com
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Death has a boarding pass and a sense of humor. This Friday we kick off spooky season with the movie that turned everyday objects into murder weapons: Final Destination (2000).

A teen has a vision of a plane exploding, yanks his friends off the flight… and then Death starts collecting. Elaborate “accidents.” Rube Goldberg kill scenes. Ali Larter. Tony Todd’s voice of doom. The question isn’t if someone’s next. It’s how stupid the next chain reaction will look.

On this episode: Stephanie’s official monthly-rotation comeback, Brian, and Jessie Hurst returning for the first time since Episode 9 (The Fifth Element). We watch the trailer, argue body counts, guess who actually walks away, and try not to get judged in the post-game.

Go watch it first if you can — it’s on HBO Max right now (or $4 to rent). You’ll have more fun roasting the deaths with us.

Episode drops Friday.
Pregame is already live.
Post-game breakdown lives on Patreon only.

See you on the other side of the explosion.

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James, Clint, and Ryan open another BMR mailbag and immediately hire a guy who sent a resume they can’t open.

Jesse Rubin gets fired from Publix, attaches an Apple Pages file, then saves himself with juice samples and walks out as Jesse Juice. Jesse Snyder praises the new mailbag guitar riff and launches a full chaps vs. ass-chaps debate courtesy of Terminal Velocity. Sean from Jefferson City says the show actually improved his mood. Ryan drops a spoiler-free take on the new Resident Evil. Special Ed Fred requests an emotional-support hotline and almost doxxes himself. Clint recaps Ginger Man / 24 Hours of LeMans (2nd in class) and points everyone to the shirtless car-wash clip. Mike Goede admits he voted Vertical Limit then buried it in awards, hopes for a 2027 calendar, and says the movies have become a family thing. Bill Gerson floats the forgotten Mr. T series T and T. A Des Moines caller describes a raccoon that nodded at him and fled a pitbull. Greg from New Jersey hits Rad Day, the Transformers 40th, and pitches Mean Guns. Adam writes in after a breakup and the table actually shows up for him. Rocker demands a Kent, Washington roast and gets Amazon warehouses and Ernie’s Fuel Stop. Trapper Dave offers to drop a raccoon in the studio. James counters with the Grass Lake Road garbage-can raccoon and a scuba air rifle.

Email: thisshowistrash@gmail.com
Voicemail: (262) 757-8567
Mail: Bad Movies Rule, PO Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105
Patreon: patreon.com/badmoviesrule
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Terror Squad (1987) takes four terrorists, a nuclear plant, and the entire town of Kokomo, Indiana, and somehow still finds time for detention, aerobics, and a car chase that will not end.

Chuck Connors is the chief of police. High schoolers are doing Breakfast Club in a boiler room. Somebody brought an RPG to a cornfield. And yes — the bus changes size mid-movie and they thought you wouldn’t notice.

James, Ryan, Curt, and Dave tear through Peter Maris’s only-in-the-80s pileup: Death-to-America cold open, hot-dog-bun recon, grocery-guy stunt work, harmonica timing, homemade crossbows, and the longest white-sedan demolition derby Kokomo ever paid for.

Awards. Recasts. The one scene that made the whole table lose it. Patreon votes in the mix.

If you like practical explosions, plans that last 20 feet, and small-town cop movies that forget what town they’re in — this is the one.

Got a correction, a voicemail, or a theory about where they got the second RPG?

Support Us: patreon.com/badmoviesrule

Email Us: ThisShowIsTrash@gmail.com

Voicemail: 262-757-8567

Mail: Bad Movies Rule, PO Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105

Gear Up: Grab tees at teepublic.com/user/bad-movies-rule
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices