Mormon Stories Podcast

In this powerful and deeply personal episode, we sit down with David Archuleta to discuss his new memoir, Devout: Losing My Faith to Find Myself. David opens up about his life inside of Mormonism, his rise to fame on American Idol, his mission, his relationship with Church leaders, and the long, painful journey toward self-acceptance as a gay man.

This conversation goes far beyond headlines. David walks us through the internalized shame, religious scrupulosity, and obsessive righteousness that shaped his childhood and young adulthood. He reflects on the messages he received about masculinity, sexuality, and obedience –and how those teachings distorted his understanding of intimacy, trust, and self-worth.

We explore David’s experiences with Mormon apostles, including M. Russell Ballard, the November 2015 Policy, and the unsettling realization that Church leaders often spoke with certainty despite privately admitting they had no answers. David shares what it was like to be counseled to marry a woman, to suppress his identity, and to believe his faith could “heal” him –while quietly spiraling toward despair.

This episode also addresses growing up in a Mormon bubble, religious OCD, messages about LGBTQ people, chastity and sin, fame and unpaid church services, leaving the church and reclaiming agency and what happiness and God look like for him now.

David speaks with extraordinary honest, vulnerability, and compassion –not just for himself, but for the countless LGBTQ people still navigating high-demand religions.

Order his book here.
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YouTube

At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

Our overall mission is to: 
1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions

🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today
One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m 
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories 
Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories 

Join this channel to get access to perks:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join

Our Platforms:
🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 
🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 
🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 
🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 
📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 
🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF 

Contact us:
📧 [email protected]
📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117

In this special Valentine’s episode, we are joined by Kolby Reddish (a rando on the internet), Nemo the Mormon, Carah Burrell (from Nuancehoe), Julia Sanders from Analyzing Mormonism and John Dehlin for a conversation that might surprise you.

Yes - We are critics of Mormonism.
Yes - We’ve experienced pain, disillusionment, and deep deconstruction.
And yet… we can hold two different truths at once.

In this episode, we model something that feels almost taboo in exMormon spaces: expressing gratitude for the things Mormonism gave us –while still being honest about its harm. 

In this episode we discuss:
- Rituals that shaped our identities
- Community and why it’s hard to leave
- Awe, wonder, and valuing the body
- Agency and free will as an act of faith
- Why compassion and justice often lead people OUT of the church
- Whether we wish to destroy the church or make it better

There are so many good people inside the Mormon church. The people are often beautiful while the system is complicated. As Richard Rohr once said: “Nobody does first half of life better than Mormons” –and we all share deep gratitude for that first half. 

This episode does not erase the negative things about the church. It doesn’t minimize harm. But it DOES ask whether we can be mature enough to acknowledge the good without surrendering our integrity.

Please purchase the book ⁠here⁠.

To support this series please donate ⁠here⁠. One half of all donations will go to Dr. Turner for as long as he is participating in the series.
___________________

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Show Notes

At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

Our overall mission is to: 
1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions

🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today
One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m 
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories 
Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories 

Join this channel to get access to perks:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join

Our Platforms:
🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 
🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 
🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 
🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 
📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 
🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF 

Contact us:
📧 [email protected]
📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117

Welcome to Part 31 in our ongoing series with Dr. John Turner, based on his new book Joseph Smith: The Rise and Fall of an American Prophet.

Today we are diving into Chapter 31, “World on Fire,” and the explosive years 1842-1843 in Nauvoo –a period marked by scandal, secrecy, political pressure, and deep internal crisis.

In this episode we cover the rise and fall of John C. Bennett and the “Spiritual Wifery” scandal. We also discuss the attempted assassination of Lilburn Boggs and the role of Porter Rockwell. We also cover aspects of polygamy, namely the Nancy Rigdon controversy and Joseph Smith’s failed proposal, the stories of Sarah Pratt and Sarah Ann Whitney (including the letter sent to the Whitneys in Joseph Smith’s own handwriting with specific instructions to burn the letter), and Emma Smith and the growing concerns in the Relief Society as well as Nauvoo at large.

We also examine how Nauvoo struggled to manage these crises, how accusations and denials shaped public perception, and why John Turner calls this moment a true “world on fire.”

If you’d like to help keep this project going, please consider donating to support this series. Your support makes long-form, in-depth historical discussion like this possible!

Please purchase the book ⁠here⁠.

To support this series please donate ⁠here⁠. One half of all donations will go to Dr. Turner for as long as he is participating in the series.
___________________

YouTube

At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

Our overall mission is to: 
1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions

🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today
One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m 
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories 
Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories 

Join this channel to get access to perks:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join

Our Platforms:
🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 
🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 
🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 
🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 
📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 
🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF 

Contact us:
📧 [email protected]
📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117

⚠️Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussions of violence, self-harm, suicide, and religious trauma.

In this deeply vulnerable and wide-ranging conversation, Kyson Dana shares his story of growing up Mormon, serving a mission in Russia, and the lifelong psychological, spiritual, and physical consequences that followed. What was supposed to be the “best two years” of his life became the most traumatic –shaping his identity, mental health, and eventual departure from the Church. 

Kyson opens up about generational trauma, internalized shame, self-policing, and suicidal ideation in his youth. He walks us through the intense pressure to be perfect, the weaponization of guilt and obedience, and how Mormonism taught him to disconnect from himself in order to survive. 

We dive deeply into the realities of missionary life in Russia: shrinking missions, violence, threats, abductions, murders, leadership silence, and explicit instructions NOT to tell families what was happening. Kyson recounts being told not to come home unless it was “in a coffin,” enduring extreme fasting, psychological abuse, and witnessing acts of violence that were never processed or acknowledged.

Beyond the mission, Kyson shares how this trauma followed him into adulthood –fueling panic disorder, Complex PTSD, and a prolonged faith crisis. He discusses therapy, EMDR, creative work, and the careful, supported use of psychedelics as part of healing. We also explore his work helping teens navigate shame-based purity culture, pornography narratives (“Fight the new drug!”), and the dangerous conflation of morality with normal human behavior. 

This episode is about far more than Mormonism –it’s about identity, belonging, survival, and what it takes to come back to yourself after an institution teaches you to turn yourself off. 

If you’ve ever felt broken by a system that promised salvation, you’re not alone.
___________________

YouTube

At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

Our overall mission is to: 
1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions

🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today
One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m 
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories 
Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories 

Join this channel to get access to perks:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join

Our Platforms:
🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 
🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 
🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 
🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 
📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 
🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF 

Contact us:
📧 [email protected]
📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117

Welcome to Episode 30 of our series The Joseph Smith Podcast with Dr. John Turner where we discuss chapters from his new book “Joseph Smith: The Rise and Fall of an American Prophet.”
In this episode, we dive further into Chapter 24 (“Upper Rooms”) from John Turner’s work and unpack the origins of the LDS Relief Society in May of 1842 –right in the middle of Joseph Smith’s secret practice of polygamy. We explore whether the Relief Society was meant to empower women, function as a stepping stone to priesthood-like authority, or help manage rumors and moral fallout from Nauvoo’s growing scandals.
From Emma Smith’s complicated position, to whispered accusations, to the infamous “Happiness Letter,” this conversation traces how secrecy, power, and polygamy collide –and what it all says about Joseph Smith’s character. We also look at whistleblowers, public denials, internal investigations (or lack thereof), and how victims and critics were treated when scandals became impossible to contain. 
This is part Mormon history, part true crime, and part moral reckoning –with big questions about leadership, secrecy, and accountability. 

Please purchase the book ⁠here⁠.
To support this series please donate ⁠here⁠. One half of all donations will go to Dr. Turner for as long as he is participating in the series.
___________________

YouTube

At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

Our overall mission is to: 
1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology
2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis
3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions

🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today
One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m 
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories 
Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories 

Join this channel to get access to perks:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join

Our Platforms:
🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 
🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories 
✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 
🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 
🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 
📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 
🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF 

Contact us:
📧 [email protected]
📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117