The Pursuit of Happywell

• Ep. 14 Compassionate Boundaries: How to Set Limits Without Guilt

  Do you break out in hives at the thought of setting a boundary? You’re not alone—and this week’s episode of The Pursuit of Happywell is a must-listen. Scott and Kristen dive deep into the emotional minefield of boundary-setting and reframe it as an act of kindness, connection, and self-respect—not cruelty.Building on last week’s episode on conflict resolution, this conversation explores:Why so many people fear setting boundariesHow people-pleasing, identity, and fear of rejection keep us stuckThe difference between reactive boundaries vs. compassionate clarityReal-life examples in marriage, parenting, work, and friendshipsHow to communicate boundaries without controlling or withdrawingThe pivotal role of self-boundaries in preventing burnout and building trustWith personal stories, powerful analogies (like dogs testing invisible fences), and practical takeaways, this episode is both soul-nourishing and eye-opening. If you're ready to stop abandoning yourself for the sake of “keeping the peace,” this one’s for you.Key Takeaways:Boundaries aren’t barriers—they’re gates with keys you offer out of love and clarity.A healthy boundary is one that helps you stay your most whole, functional self.You can’t set boundaries with others if you constantly violate your own.Healthy people respect your boundaries; people who benefited from your lack of them will test them.Boundaries evolve with seasons—evaluate and adjust with intention, not guilt.If this episode resonated with you, don’t keep it to yourself! Share it with a friend, leave a review, and hit that subscribe button. Have a boundary breakthrough? Comment on YouTube or tag @thehappywell on social media and tell us about it.And take the free Stress Type Quiz to discover your go-to stress response and learn how to manage it better. sonderalife.com/podquizWe also have an active community for listeners of The Pursuit of Happywell. Join our community on facebook: The Pursuit of Happywell Community or find the website at LiveHappywell.comTimestamps:00:00 – Intro: Why boundaries feel so hard02:00 – What a boundary really is (not a wall!)05:30 – People-pleasing and fear of being unloved08:30 – The identity crisis that comes with becoming a boundaried person11:00 – Healthy vs. reactive boundaries14:00 – How we sabotage our own boundaries18:00 – Compassionate clarity: the new lens for setting limits27:00 – Real-life scenarios: family, work, marriage, kids45:00 – Boundaries with yourself: the game-changer50:00 – Happywell Homework: Your boundary resetGuest/Host Info:Hosted by Kristen and Scott Boss, founders of The Happywell Podcast, this power duo brings both personal insight and practical wisdom to the table, blending emotional health, neuroscience, and relational wellness for a more grounded life.

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• Ep. 11 Toxic Productivity: When Getting Things Done Becomes Self-Harm

  In this powerful and introspective episode of The Pursuit of Happywell, hosts Kristen and Scott dive into the culturally normalized trap of toxic productivity—the relentless drive to produce at the cost of your wellbeing. They explore how productivity becomes harmful when it's used to outrun shame, anxiety, or a fear of stillness, and why rest isn't laziness, it's necessary.Through candid storytelling and relatable insights, they unpack how hustle culture is subtly rewarded and how society often praises the very behaviors that are emotionally and physically depleting us. Kristin shares vulnerable reflections on her personal journey with burnout, shame-driven work habits, and the process of redefining success through rest, restoration, and presence.If you’ve ever felt guilty for taking a break, equated your worth with your output, or struggled to slow down without spiraling into self-criticism, this episode will resonate deeply.What You’ll Learn:What toxic productivity is and how it masquerades as success.Why slowing down feels unsafe for many people—and how to reframe rest as productive.How cultural and internalized narratives feed the hustle and prevent healing.The science behind our stress responses and the importance of psychological safety.Practical steps to protect your wellbeing and shift away from soul-draining productivity.Key Takeaways:Toxic productivity is self-harm disguised as achievement.Culture reinforces the idea that “busy” equals “worthy.”Rest is not laziness—it’s how we protect the asset: ourselves.Stillness is deeply uncomfortable at first, but essential for healing.New life metrics rooted in peace, meaning, and presence are the antidote.We also have an active community for listeners of The Pursuit of Happywell. Join our community on facebook: The Pursuit of Happywell Community or find the website at LiveHappywell.comTimestamps:00:00 – Intro & what to expect in this episode01:00 – Defining toxic productivity02:45 – How culture and shame drive the hustle05:00 – Why rest feels unsafe and the internal cost12:00 – The myth of “busy” as a badge of honor18:30 – Stillness as medicine for the soul24:00 – Protecting your production capacity30:00 – New metrics: from doing to being36:00 – Happywell Homework: Stillness without metrics

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• Ep. 10 Dream or Drain? The Rise of the Intrapreneur

  Episode Summary:In this powerful and truth-packed episode, Kristen and Scott Boss challenge the glorified narrative of entrepreneurship that’s been sold to so many—especially in the age of hustle culture and Instagram highlight reels. Not everyone is made to be an entrepreneur, and that’s not a flaw. In fact, it could be your biggest strength.If you've ever felt burned out by building a business, questioned whether you're "wired for this," or wondered if there's a better way to do fulfilling work without the crushing pressure of being your own boss, this episode is your sigh of relief.They break down the common myths that sell a glamorized version of entrepreneurship—like "be your own boss," "work when you want," and "do what you love"—and expose the real stressors that come with the entrepreneurial life, including decision fatigue, emotional isolation, identity fusion, and uncertainty overload.Then, they introduce a refreshing and empowering alternative: the intrapreneur—the visionary team player who thrives within someone else's mission. You’ll discover the signs that you might be one and explore a list of exciting, flexible, high-impact roles you might have overlooked.This episode is your permission slip to pursue meaningful work that energizes you—instead of draining you.What You’ll Learn:Why entrepreneurship might not be the right path for everyone—and why that’s okayThe sneaky myths that lead people into burnout and self-doubtThe real difference between entrepreneurs and intrapreneurs10+ career paths where you can thrive without carrying all the riskHow to identify whether you're a firestarter or a firekeeper (and why the world needs both)How to align your work with your strengths, energy, and season of lifeKey Takeaways:You don’t need to be a founder to change lives—you just need alignment and fulfillment.Entrepreneurship can be for anyone, but not everyone should do it.Intrapreneurs are the under-celebrated powerhouses behind every thriving business.There's a big difference between time freedom and free time.The myth of "do what you love" often overlooks the 80% of work that isn't in your zone of genius.We also have an active community for listeners of The Pursuit of Happywell. Join our community on facebook: The Pursuit of Happywell Community or find the website at LiveHappywell.comTimestamps:0:00 – Why not everyone should be an entrepreneur2:30 – Debunking the “be your own boss” myth6:00 – The illusion of time freedom9:30 – Doing what you love vs. doing everything 13:00 – The money myth: Stability vs. unpredictability15:30 – Are you really wired for this?17:00 – The stressors that drain entrepreneurs29:00 – Entrepreneur vs. Intrapreneur33:00 – Signs you might be an intrapreneur41:00 – 10 energizing intrapreneur career ideas50:00 – Homework: Is your dream actually a drain?

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• Ep. 9 Money, Marriage & Meltdowns: Healing Financial Fights with Connection

  What happens when the “money talk” in marriage goes sideways—like, full-on flop-to-the-floor dramatic? In this candid and often hilarious episode, your favorite husband-wife duo unpacks the deep emotional layers tied to money in relationships. From childhood money stories to budgeting meltdowns (yes, there was floor-throwing), they get real about how financial conversations became less contentious and more connective over the years.This isn’t a budget spreadsheet how-to—this is the emotional psychology of how couples navigate money, power, autonomy, and values. You’ll hear about their first budgeting disaster, secret spending (ahem, Kohl's card), revenge buying, and ultimately how they found peace through shared vision, regular money dates, and understanding each other’s financial triggers.What You’ll Learn:Why 57% of divorces link back to money—and what you can do to avoid becoming that statHow to identify and reframe your childhood money storiesThe difference between budgeting for control vs. budgeting for connectionWhat “revenge spending” looks like and why it’s more common than you thinkHow to use “green light, yellow light, red light” decisions to prevent resentmentHow to start having safe, emotionally intelligent money talks with your partnerKey Takeaways:Money isn’t just about dollars—it's about emotional safety and autonomyConsistent, low-stress money check-ins can be intimacy-buildingSharing a financial vision helps couples stop fighting and start dreamingTimestamps:00:01 – Why money is the #2 reason for divorce03:00 – The first budgeting fight (feat. a dramatic floor dive)10:00 – How childhood shaped their views on money and control16:30 – Spending vs. saving vs. shared vision25:00 – Secret spending, autonomy, and “beauty budgets”34:00 – Revenge spending (and how they caught themselves)39:00 – Using the green-yellow-red light system for decisions44:00 – How they made budgeting fun with sushi and values alignment49:00 – This week’s Happy Well Homework challengeThanks for listening! Reminder: there are still tickets available for the Breakthrough Live Summit happening this Friday, May 16th. Kristen and Scott will guide participants through exercises designed to create breakthrough, clarity, and forward momentum. Find out more and grab your ticket here.

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• Ep. 8 Behind the Scenes: The Raw Truth About Starting Over

  In this raw and candid behind-the-scenes episode, Kristen and Scott peel back the curtain on what it’s really like to start something new — together. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, changing careers, or simply stepping into a new life chapter, this conversation is for you.They dive into the high hopes, uncertainties, and unexpected lessons that come when you're building from scratch — all while doing life alongside your spouse. With very little prep and a whole lot of heart, they share stories about startup challenges, unexpected arguments (like co-working chaos and company names!), imposter syndrome, hiring a team, and staying grounded when the doubts creep in.This episode will inspire you to embrace uncertainty, trust the messy middle, and stay true to yourself even when reinvention feels scary.In This Episode, You'll Hear:Why uncertainty is a sign you're growing, not failingThe surprising emotional work behind launching a startupHow working with your spouse can be hilarious (and humbling)What to do when imposter syndrome tries to sabotage your momentumThe power of redefining success and setting new "life metrics"How they are intentionally building a mission-driven company without burning outKey Takeaways:Both excitement and doubt are normal when stepping into the unknown. Growth always brings resistance.Building a company (or a new chapter) is more about intentionality and less about hustle.You don't have to be an "expert" — sharing your experience with authenticity can be even more powerful.Protect your energy by honoring your current season and capacity.Moving from "me" to "we" thinking can transform how you experience change and leadership.Episode Timestamps:00:00 — Intro: Taking Big Leaps and Asking, "What Did I Just Sign Up For?"01:30 — The Reality of Starting Over (With Your Spouse)04:00 — Startup Expectations vs. Reality06:50 — Our Funniest Fights While Building Together12:30 — The "Uh-Oh" Moment That Made It Real17:30 — How This New Venture Changed Us Personally24:00 — Lessons on Unlearning Hyper-Independence30:00 — Feeling Like Imposters — And What Helped Us Through It40:00 — Life Is Always Life-ing: How to Keep Building Anyway48:00 — Holding Both Excitement and Terror55:00 — How We Support Each Other When One of Us SpiralsIf you're navigating a new beginning right now or looking to get inspired in your current season of life, Kristen and Scott would like to invite you to join their upcoming Breakthrough Live Summit. While the in-person event is sold out, virtual tickets are available for the May 16th intensive, where they'll guide participants through exercises designed to create breakthrough, clarity, and forward momentum. Find out more and grab your ticket here.

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