The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}
Robyn Gobbel

Latest episode
385 episodes
- I know you are working so, so, so hard to hold onto your owl brain.
Maybe you're at the stage where you don't even notice you've flipped your lid until hours later.
Maybe you're at the stage where you can see it happening and still can't stop it.
Either way, there's probably an old, familiar voice telling you that you should be further along than you are by now.
I was once exactly there, too. Hollering- literally - at my own therapist for the reality that I wasn’t changing faster. I was MAD.
I finally finally, finally had to consider believing what she was offering me- that I was exactly where I needed to be in that moment, and I was shifting and changing as fast as I could.
I have had the experience on both sides of the couch- the person who was so angry I wasn’t changing faster AND the therapist who believed with my whole being that my client was exactly where they needed to be- even if that truth was extremely painful.
I wrote the Guided Journal from that space between.
In this episode you will learn:
Why hearing "you're exactly where you need to be" from my own therapist once felt more like a threat than comfort
What made a therapist's steady presence more powerful than any of the tools she had, even all her training in about five bajillion techniques
Why the guided journal was crafted with no agenda, no required order, and nowhere you have to arrive by the last page
The Guided Journal is out today, September 21 — grab it wherever you love to buy books, or catch a signed copy through Schuler Books. Details on tonight's Grand Rapids signing, the Richmond events, and the October 1st online celebration are all at robyngobbel.com.
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/exactlyright
The Guided Journal will ship to your mailbox on September 21 2026 if you pre-order NOW!
You can pre-order anywhere you buy books online. If you'd like a personalized signed copy, pre-order from my local independant book store!
Lots of pre-order options, including my local bookstore, and a way to pre-order in bulk (5 or more) and receive a BIG discount at RobynGobbel.com/GuidedJournal
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) - Almost always when I’m teaching or presenting, a parent is finally brave enough to ask: “What if I'm too burned out to do any of this?”
And then at least half the other parents in the room look expectantly at me because they, too, are wondering how they could possibly conjure up enough energy to use playfulness. They aren’t even sure they like their kid enough to offer enough cues of safety.
This episode looks at the physiology of burn out, why the strategies you already know feel completely out of reach when you're this depleted, and what's actually possible from here.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why it takes a lot more than pushing through burnout to shift out of it
Why rest (not more effort) is the first real step toward healing
How teeny tiny drops of safety, not big sweeping changes, are what actually start tipping the scale back toward connection
If you’re looking for a place to start accumulating cues of safety for yourself, come join us in The Club the next time we are welcoming new members!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Felt Safety (Inside) - Part 1 {EP 161} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetyinside
Felt Safety (Outside) - Part 2 {EP 162} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetyoutside
Felt Safety (Between) - Part 3 {EP 163} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetybetween
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/tooburnedout
The Guided Journal will ship to your mailbox on September 21 2026 if you pre-order NOW!
You can pre-order anywhere you buy books online. If you'd like a personalized signed copy, pre-order from my local independant book store!
Lots of pre-order options, including my local bookstore, and a way to pre-order in bulk (5 or more) and receive a BIG discount at RobynGobbel.com/GuidedJournal
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) - You've called every therapist in town and heard the same thing back: not taking new clients. Or you're the one on the other end of that call, staring at a kid whose behavior you can't make sense of, wondering if you're just not cut out for this.
I get it. I intimately understand both sides of this struggle.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why a dysregulated parent needs the same thing from their practitioner that a child needs from their parent
What actually changes behavior long-term (hint: unfortunately, it’s not a tool. That would be this easy!)
Why this nested process — professional, parent, child — is the core framework that makes the Immersion Program unique. And, what makes it work.
Apply for the Immersion Program at RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Find a practitioner who is an Immersion Program Graduate at RobynGobbel.com/Directory
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Apply for the Immersion Program → RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Find a practitioner who is an Immersion Program Graduate → RobynGobbel.com/Directory
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/samething
The Guided Journal will ship to your mailbox on September 21 2026 if you pre-order NOW!
You can pre-order anywhere you buy books online. If you'd like a personalized signed copy, pre-order from my local independant book store!
Lots of pre-order options, including my local bookstore, and a way to pre-order in bulk (5 or more) and receive a BIG discount at RobynGobbel.com/GuidedJournal
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) - My guiding north star when I was a therapist working with kids (and grown-ups) was always helping them not just get to know their brain and how it works, but actually to develop a relationship with the parts of themselves that seemed to always be getting into trouble. It's not really just brain facts that are helpful to kids. Teaching them about their brain creates the possibility that they can develop a new relationship with their brain- and that’s where the real magic starts to happen.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why understanding your kid's brain matters less than helping them build an actual relationship with it — one held by compassion and curiosity instead of judgment
What integration of consciousness and state integration mean, and why flexibility between an owl, watchdog, and possum state (or whatever your family calls them) is the real marker of change
Why modeling this with your own watchdog and possum first gives your kid permission to risk doing the same
I’m teaching a live webinar on how to actually do this with your own kids on September 8 — and if you're already part of The Club, it's included, no extra registration needed.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Online Training! Teach Kids About Their Owl, Watchdog & Possum Brain! → RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrain
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/relationshiptobrain
The Guided Journal will ship to your mailbox on September 21 2026 if you pre-order NOW!
You can pre-order anywhere you buy books online. If you'd like a personalized signed copy, pre-order from my local independant book store!
Lots of pre-order options, including my local bookstore, and a way to pre-order in bulk (5 or more) and receive a BIG discount at RobynGobbel.com/GuidedJournal
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) EP 280: Either You Co-Regulate or You De-Escalate: An Interview with Chrissy D’Agostino
2026-08-25 | 57 mins.You've probably heard "a dysregulated adult can't co-regulate a child" a hundred times. But if you've ever been stuck in a store with a screaming kid — or a classroom with 17 screaming kids — and zero bandwidth left, you know how useless that advice can feel in the moment. This episode is a conversation with Chrissy D'Agostino, co-author of the new Early Years Guidebook from the Regulated Classroom, about what to do when you're with a dysregulated child, and you're dysregulated too. You’ll hear practical ideas that are actually helpful for a stressed and tapped-out grown-up.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why relying so heavily on your voice and your words all day is quietly wearing down your nervous system
The four practices (connectors, activators, settlers, affirmations) that help widen everyone's window of tolerance, at home or in the classroom
Why "meet the moment" is a more useful goal than "manage the outcome"
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Regulated Classroom → Regulated Classroom
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/earlyyears
The Guided Journal will ship to your mailbox on September 21 2026 if you pre-order NOW!
You can pre-order anywhere you buy books online. If you'd like a personalized signed copy, pre-order from my local independant book store!
Lots of pre-order options, including my local bookstore, and a way to pre-order in bulk (5 or more) and receive a BIG discount at RobynGobbel.com/GuidedJournal
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)
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About The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}
Formerly the Parenting after Trauma podcast, internationally recognized children's mental health expert Robyn Gobbel decodes the most baffling behaviors for parents of kids with vulnerable nervous systems. If you're parenting a child who has experienced trauma or toxic stress or a child with a neuroimmune disorder, sensory processing, or other nervous system vulnerability, this show will let you know you are not alone. You can stop playing behavior whack-a-mole because Robyn offers you tools that actually work. You can become your child's expert, feel more confident as a parent, and bring more connection and clarity into your family.Educators, therapists, coaches and consultants- you too can learn all about what behavior really is and become more effective at helping the families you support. You can love your work again!
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