The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

A dad - who is also a former foster youth and the director of non-profit supporting foster and adoptive families - shares an honest and tender conversation about what it's actually like to parent kids with big, baffling behaviors when life is also impossibly hard. He shares the staggering losses his family has carried over the past few years, how he found The Baffling Behavior Show, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors, and The Club…and what has genuinely helped him keep going. This one is for every parent who has felt utterly alone in this journey- AND for every professional who needs a reminder of what the real work actually is.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why being seen by people who truly get it matters more than any tool or strategy
How learning to receive and offer presence (not just advice) changes the way you show up everywhere- with your kids, at work, and even in a Whataburger drive-through
What it looks like to hold hope and honesty at the same time- staying grounded in how hard things really are without sliding into toxic positivity or despair
The Club is welcoming new members from now until Tuesday! 
Join us now and you can come live to the Parenting with your OWN History of Trauma or Vulnerable Nervous System Masterclass AND the workshop on Mapping Your Child's Nervous System. 
We can't wait to meet you! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Let's hang out this summer at two different trainings for professionals!
Therapy with Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors- June 1 & 2 in Syracuse, NY RobynGobbel.com/NY
Presence in Practice- July 15, 16, & 17 in Rockford, MI (outside Grand Rapids) RobynGobbel.com/Michigan2026
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

A single mom who adopted boy-girl twins through foster care shares about her slow, almost invisible journey from survival mode to genuinely delighting in her now-13-year-old kids. Nothing shifted in one big moment.  Yet somehow, everything changed.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why the shift from "I have to fix this right now" to "I can just be with you in this" is the thing that changes everything — for your kids and for you
How letting go of performing shame (in school meetings, with professionals, for society) freed up the energy to actually parent
Why the biggest leaps — academic, emotional, social — consistently happened during the stretches when they stopped trying to fix anything and just existed together
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/everythingchanged
The Club is welcoming new members from now until Tuesday! 
Join us now and you can come live to the Parenting with your OWN History of Trauma or Vulnerable Nervous System Masterclass AND the workshop on Mapping Your Child's Nervous System. 
We can't wait to meet you! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Let's hang out this summer at two different trainings for professionals!
Therapy with Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors- June 1 & 2 in Syracuse, NY RobynGobbel.com/NY
Presence in Practice- July 15, 16, & 17 in Rockford, MI (outside Grand Rapids) RobynGobbel.com/Michigan2026
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Parenting kids with big, baffling behaviors is hard enough. THEN someone has opinions about it. This episode breaks down why people say the things they say, what's actually happening in you when judgment lands, and how to respond- or not respond- in a way that protects your own regulation.
In this episode:
Why unsolicited advice and criticism are almost always a projection from the other person's protection brain 
How to recognize when explaining yourself won't actually help 
Practical ways to respond to judgment
Scripts
"Thank you. I'm comfortable with our parenting decisions."
"I hear you. I need to tend to my child right now."
Neutral / Redirect
"We've got it covered, thanks."
"We have a lot of support around this."
"I have people I go to for that."
"That's not something I'm looking for input on."
"We're working with someone on it."
Warmer with a Clear Boundary
"I appreciate that you care. We're good."
"Thanks for thinking of us — we've got support."
Confident / Firmer
"I'm not looking for advice, but thank you."
"That's not actually something I'm open to feedback on."
"We're pretty settled on how we're handling it."
"I'm not going to take that in, but I hear you."
For the chronic offender
"We've talked about this- we're not changing course."
"I've let you know this isn't something I want input on."
The subject-change version
"Mmm. Anyway…" (and move on)
"Noted." (full stop)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/judgement
The Club is welcoming new members from now until Tuesday! 
Join us now and you can come live to the Parenting with your OWN History of Trauma or Vulnerable Nervous System Masterclass AND the workshop on Mapping Your Child's Nervous System. 
We can't wait to meet you! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Whether you're supporting a dysregulated eight-year-old, a parent who's convinced nothing is working, or the version of yourself driving home after a really hard week, the science is exactly the same. Let’s look at how the theory underneath this podcast, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors, and the BBTI’s Professional Immersion Program are grounded in the same unified relational neuroscience framework. This paradigm supports your work with kids, parents, and yourself. You only have to learn it once, because it scales!
This is the second episode in a row I’ve recorded for professionals and helpers. Next week, we’ll be back with episodes for parents! (Of course, anyone can listen to all of them!)
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why the nervous system framework that explains kids' behavior is the exact same one that explains parents' behavior…and yours
What it actually means to "be the owl" as a professional, and why that is the intervention
Why your reactions to clients aren't failures of professionalism. Their information, and getting curious about them, makes you a better helper

Resources mentioned in this podcast:
All Behavior Makes Sense {EP 198}

Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/framework
The Club is welcoming new members from now until Tuesday! 
Join us now and you can come live to the Parenting with your OWN History of Trauma or Vulnerable Nervous System Masterclass AND the workshop on Mapping Your Child's Nervous System. 
We can't wait to meet you! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

The helpers ~ therapists, coaches, teachers, advocates ~ are burning out at alarming rates. We talk endlessly about self-care, caseload management, and having better boundaries but almost nobody is addressing the root cause. 
This is a special episode that I recorded for all the professionals who listen. All the helpers who show up day after day because they love to help the parents of kids with big, baffling behaviors. All the helpers who are tired and wondering how much longer they can keep doing this. 
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why working with clients in chronic protection mode pulls helpers into protection mode too - and how that's the real starting point of burnout
Applying the "all behavior makes sense" framework to your own nervous system responses changes everything about how you work
The skill that actually prevents burnout - and why bubble baths and calendar blocking aren't it
And if you want to learn more, you can join 4000+ other professionals and me in Making Sense of Baffling Behaviors- a 4-part free audio training for professionals!

Resources mentioned in this podcast:
All Behavior Makes Sense {EP 198}

Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/burnout
The Club is welcoming new members from now until Tuesday! 
Join us now and you can come live to the Parenting with your OWN History of Trauma or Vulnerable Nervous System Masterclass AND the workshop on Mapping Your Child's Nervous System. 
We can't wait to meet you! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)