How to Deal with Raising a Highly Sensitive or Neurodivergent Kid
Episode Summary
Eli sits down with Kristin Gallant, co-founder of Big Little Feelings, to dig into one of the most misunderstood parenting challenges: raising a child who feels everything — deeply, loudly, and fully. Together they unpack what it really means to have a "big feeler" in your home, why the goal was never to make sensitive kids less sensitive, and the three most powerful things parents can do to help these kids thrive.
Key Takeaways
There's a spectrum of sensitivity. Big feelers aren't just one type of kid — some push their feelings outward (intensity, drive), others turn them inward (overwhelm, collapse). Knowing your child's pattern matters.
First step: rule out or rule in neurodivergence. Many highly sensitive kids are also autistic, have ADHD, or both. Getting clarity on how your child's brain works is one of the most powerful gifts you can give them.
Believe your child. When the slide feels terrifying or the smell of salami is physically painful, validate it. Children who are believed learn to trust and advocate for themselves.
Teach the Zones of Regulation. Help your child identify what zone they're in (red, yellow, green) and what they need in that state — this is more powerful than simply validating feelings.
Diagnosis = understanding, not a verdict. Labels give children language, resources, and permission to stop wondering "what's wrong with me?"
Your home can be the safe haven the world isn't. You may not be able to change the world for your big feeler, but you can make home a place where they don't have to mask.
Resilience doesn't come from masking. It comes from authentic connection, belonging, and supported coping — not from teaching kids to suppress who they are.
Let them bloom on their own timeline. Attuning to your child and meeting their nervous system where it is creates the safety from which real growth — extroversion, advocacy, friendship — can organically emerge.
About the Guest
Kristin Gallant is a parent coach and co-founder of Big Little Feelings, one of the most trusted parenting resources on the internet. Alongside her business partner Deena Margolin (a licensed child therapist), Kristin has created research-backed, parent-approved courses used by over 500,000 families. Diagnosed with ADHD at 37, and a mom to an autistic child, Kristin brings both professional expertise and deeply personal experience to her work. Her newest course, the Big Feelers Program, was built specifically for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids.
🌐 Website: https://biglittlefeelings.com/
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/biglittlefeelings
Resources Mentioned
🎓 Big Feelers Program (Big Little Feelings Course) — The course built for parents of highly sensitive, ADHD, and autistic kids: https://biglittlefeelings.com/products/big-feelers
📘 The Zones of Regulation by Leah Kuypers — The self-regulation curriculum referenced in this episode (red zone, yellow zone, green zone framework): https://www.zonesofregulation.com/ Also on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Zones-Regulation-Leah-Kuypers/dp/B008M7E0G8
📗 Permission to Feel by Dr. Marc Brackett (Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence) — Referenced when discussing the importance of labeling emotions (mentalizing): https://www.amazon.com/Permission-Feel-Unlocking-Emotions-Ourselves/dp/1250212847 Learn more about Marc's work: https://marcbrackett.com/
🏫 Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence — Marc Brackett's research center on emotional intelligence: https://medicine.yale.edu/childstudy/communitypartnerships/ycei/
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